Thoughts on Tri: Meiko Mochi-SUE-ki

SPOILERS & LEGIT TRIGGER WARNING!

Trigger warning for the fact that I am going to be talking about my life, which will contain potentially sensitive material to those who have experienced similar things, if not the same exact things.

 

I went into a crazy spew on Tumblr some time after the release of Confession, primarily focusing on how inclined I was to be irritated at Meiko's behavior, especially towards Izumi.  Just so you don't have to read the extended version of what I had to say there, I'll only bring up what's important in this.  However, if you insist on reading the whole thing, click right here.

Before I get into why I don't like Mochizuki Meiko, I'll admit that there are a few good traits to this character.  I sincerely doubt that there wouldn't be a whole #MeikoDefenseWeek if there wasn't something that people found appealing about her.

Let's not kid ourselves: Meiko is cute, shy, and nice.  She's also pretty smart too, least she wouldn't have been as helpful to Mimi during the school festival.  Whenever Meicoomon really loses her shit, Meiko comes running, even though she ends up not really being much help and having to get saved by Yamato multiple times and by Taichi once in the last installment.  The point I'm trying to make is that she's also super caring, especially about her partner.  These points about Meiko I suppose is what makes her appealing, and all reasonably so.

Now putting aside the obvious fact that her personality is the average Original Character, I can almost see the appeal of this character.
Truth is, there isn't any girl like her in the Digimon Adventure series, as most of the girls are strong-headed to some degree or another.  In a way, I'm assuming this dramatic change in personality was supposed to be a breath of fresh air.  In fact, I'll even dare say that this constant state of feeling weak only to come out strong in the end is supposed to be this great inspiring thing for people who couldn't relate to Digimon until now, especially people who hide in a bashful shell, although that bashful shell (from my experience) has lead me to believe that (nine times out of ten) it is only a mask to hide something else that is the polar opposite of true bashfulness.
If Meiko is not some representation of some part of the fanbase, then I'm guessing she is the embodiment of some sick fantasy, probably from a typical OC, and everyone said that it was okay.

So how is it possible for me to admit all of this and still not like her character that much, but still like similar characters of personality like Kuronuma Sawako from Kimi ni Todoke?
Because it's not endearing - in Sawako's case, her shyness didn't really stop her from trying to help the people she was around.  Even though she helped out from time to time trembling, Sawako did it anyway and everything worked out one way or another.  In Meiko's case, she is silent and more overwhelmed by feelings than trying to contribute to the best interests of the team. When things go wrong, she blames herself for it, and the sad truth is that she is to blame to an extent: she refused to take responsibility and open up to the team about the important things they needed to know (in Confession, it was about Meicoomon being the source of the virus) and all of this in the name of... I don't know... drama? 
If Meiko had been more like Sawako, then I would have been more inclined to like her, and might have given into the idea of pairing her with Taichi.  However, the fact is that Meiko's shyness is not only not endearing, but saying that it's annoying is putting it nicely.

Now I know some of you might be trying to argue at this point that you don't need a reason to be friends with someone.  That's true, and the supportive nature of the others (especially Sora and Mimi) really shows how good friends they are, but the silence from Meiko's end tells you things about her character and that she's perfectly fine with the other Chosen Children suffering - just as long as she can beat herself up over it in the end.  Now thankfully, this becomes less and less of an issue, but it's prevalent throughout the entire anime.

I also said in that Tumblr post that I sympathized with Meiko, and I still do.  However, there are just certain behaviors that I am guilty of that not only do I not like about myself, but see very plainly in this character.

Remember when I said there was a trigger warning?  I meant that in the most medical sense I know how, since it is used in the medical field for situations that I'm about to talk about, and not what the internet has made it out to be.  Nonetheless, you have been warned.
 
You see, while on the outside I looked to have a pretty normal childhood, I did not.  The most that I will go into this is that I was emotionally neglected (I'll even dare say emotionally abused, but you get the picture) in which I thought at the time to be completely normal. 
I only bring this up to point out what I had allowed it to become in my life: selfishness.
You see, when you lack something in your life, you try to use your own means to make up for that loss - that's just how the human brain (and even emotion) works.  Perhaps I didn't see it at the time, but now I see that the reason why I was so inclined to make sure I wasn't hurt again (and perhaps to make sure that my own emotional needs were catered to in some fashion or another) was because of this inward fear that if I didn't do it, no on else would do it for me.  Thankfully, I have matured enough past that stage and now walk the road to care more about others than something as petty as my own emotional needs.

Meiko, though hard to see at ground level (and maybe not even intentionally), is constantly selfish throughout Digimon Tri, or at least allows selfishness to manifest throughout the story because, I don't know, she Mrs. Sweet and Gentle and for more drama?  I already pointed out how she sometimes runs into the danger, and I think that was for unnecessary dramatic effect, but there were plenty of other things that displays how selfish Meiko really is, and it was the most obvious to me during Confession.

So how exactly is this possible?  Izumi starts questioning Meiko after Meicoomon kills Leomon and jumps through a distortion.  Mimi criticizes Izumi not for questioning Meiko, but how he was going about it, since he was making her cry, probably because the loss of her partner by that point was so overwhelming and perhaps rightly so because, as the story suggests, this chick never had to engage in any kind of battle with Meicoomon until the events in Digimon Tri.

This was all fine and dandy to me... until Taichi tries to encourage Meiko to tell Izumi anything she might know... only to be shot down by Mimi.

Meiko says later on in that very scene that she needs to apologize to Izumi, but what irritates me is the fact that she never does.  If she had at least done that, it would have made the fact that she never tells him the most critical information in Digimon Tri a little more bearable.  I kid you not, because of Meiko's deliberate choice to refuse taking action and telling Izumi the very detail everyone needs to know, Izumi is forced to take extreme measures by tirelessly going through any and all data he might have to get some lead on something that could have been easily resolved through simple communication, as all teammates should be able to do, especially after knowing each other for six years.  Even though Meiko just started out, I'm surprised Taichi was the only one that encouraged her to say something, and even then in that one scene alone, almost as if Meiko's thoughtlessness rubs off on everyone else.

Now how do I know this could have been easily resolved through verbal communication? Because just before the other children go to the Digital World, Meiko tells Takeru!

And I'm just sitting here wondering, "WHY COULDN'T YOU HAVE DONE THAT BEFORE!?"

Oh, but we wouldn't have had more drama and more filler if Meiko had told Izumi straight out about Meicoomon.  Besides, it's fine because Izumi remembers something that helps with his Mega evolution! 🙃

Yeah right... 😡

After some thought, and a little research, I realized that there was another detail in the midst that I didn't give much thought to until now that has the strongest connection to Meiko's unintentional selfishness: the establishment of guilt.

In bittersweet irony, I can honestly say that I can relate to Meiko here too.  Remember the emotional neglect/abuse I told you about?  Well, common sense and basic psychology points to victims forming a sense of guilt over these things, as if telling themselves not only is it their fault without any real proof, but eventually believe it like second nature if no one picks up on the issue and talk them out of it.

Meiko, throughout the entire anime, beats herself up over Meicoomon's outrages like it's her fault.  Yes, she made the memories with Mecioomon, but it was a past enemy of the Chosen Children that was responsible for screwing Meicoomon over in the first place.  To a degree, I understand the guilt, but for someone who's supposed to be smart, she lacks common sense to put these together and be strong for her partner. 
The messed up thing about all of this is that such people do exist, as I too had a point in my life where was was intellectually inclined but lacked common sense.  This is another trait I shared with Meiko I find distasteful now, at least in the department of belittled common sense.
Is she constantly putting herself under this pressure because she doesn't know what to do?  Is she doing this because this is all she can do?  I sometimes can't help but wonder if Meiko is also mentally ill in some degree, and they never address that through the anime because it wouldn't fit the dramatic narrative and their perverted idea of love for Taichi.

The more I keep thinking about all these things concerning Meiko, the more I see a lot of who I used to be back when I had depression that was never diagnosed and just cringe at it.  Meiko's a sweet girl, don't get me wrong, but she's so freaking helpless in this anime, and I suppose that's what I can't stand.  All Meiko does is cry, feel sorry for herself, and do the right thing at the last minute: I feel like I've heard the same thing somewhere with a vampire romance.

I suppose what I'm trying to say about relating to Meiko is that its all the wrong things: cowardice, selfishness, ignorance, and emotionally responding to situations rather than common sense.

Some of you might be asking yourself at this point about why I'm not the least bit inspired by this character, despite sharing so many similarities.  The fact is, all of her character development is put on the back burner until the last minute.  Every time someone told her to cheer up, she didn't seem to be the least bit encouraged, and maybe under reasonable circumstances, but it also proves how Meiko really doesn't trust the team, much less herself.  Given all the details I mentioned before, it makes sense, but what about the common sense of it not really helping the situation?  Was she even meant to help the situation at all and just be the poor sweet little victim?  I don't know... I really don't know.

Above all this, and to put insult to injury, Meiko's emotional "improvement" is not only very late in the anime but it's not that much.

Excuse me if I sound super cold when I say this, but I think her losing her partner in the end was an improvement, as I couldn't bring myself to feel sorry for her because she's been a coward throughout most of the anime.  Don't mistaken this as me not feeling sorry for Meicoomon herself, as Meicoomon was, in fact, the real victim here.
Not even the memories she shared with her partner encouraged her in the slightest to do what she could except run in at the worst of times, and that alone is appalling because it was the memories she made with Meicoomon and the memories of the others that made Meicoomon so insanely powerful in the first place, at least aside from the virus... and the weird power that suddenly flows from Meiko's digivice that is responsible for the inevitable evolution of Omnimon: Merciful Mode.

I'm sorry, but the fact is that Meiko Mochizuki is a huge Mary Sue: she was a Sue at the very beginning with her over the top cute nerdy-ness and has remained a Sue for the rest of Digimon Tri because the best she has ever done is cry and feel sorry either about herself or how she thinks its her fault, but at least she was right about that (again, to an extent).  All of this wrapped up in not taking the opportunities to help when she clearly was the only who could do anything, and you have the new and main star of the show: the drama queen Meiko Mochi-Sue-ki.

In speaking of being a drama queen, am I the only one who thinks it's odd that Meiko's emotions are better animated than anyone else?

The only good thing that I can think of right now is the fact that every other Chosen Child can easily take Mochizuki Meiko if she is approached as a cautionary tale.  You see, she had all the power because of she had all the memories, but she was poorly balanced in experience, and ended up becoming a hindrance (and inevitably evil) because of it.

...Now if you'll excuse me, I better back away from this again before I get another headache.