Before I get into the meat of this, two confessions first:
First, this week (technically March 18, 2023), marks a three year anniversary of something really horrible that happened to me. I was kicked out of the house of somebody who meant a lot to me, who also happened to be my abuser: the final straw after three months of emotional and physical abuse. I bring it up because the nature of this post (on reflection) is probably why my brain connected it to The Owl House, my current hyperfixation, if you will.
Second, this is basically an extended version of various tweets that I had made hours before time of writing. Figured it make sense to try to bring it all together... try.
Anyway, if you've been following me on Tumblr recently, you're probably seeing some stuff being liked and shared relating back to Hunter (a comfort character for me in some capacity or the other), usually either with Willow as girlfriend or Darius as a father. I'm going to be focusing on the latter relationship of Darius and Hunter in a father/son-like relationship, which is common among the internet as either Wovengold or it's more popular name, Dadrius.
If my information is correct, what got this father/son-ship off the ground to becoming as popular as it is regards to a scene in Any Sport in A Storm. If not then, then definitely after Hollow Mind.
I want to take a step back and recap the scene in Any Sport in A Storm.
Let me make something else clear: I understand the intention of the scene. At its core, it's supposed to be akin to a joke, or to break the ice between Darius and Hunter, but after recent events, I feel the need to ask... was this scene appropriate?
If you've never experienced abuse, then maybe you've experienced another form of really painful memories? Maybe after that event, small things remind you of that (a smell, a sight, a certain thing, etc.), and even though it's illogical, it still upsets you when this "small thing" sets you off?
Unless your therapist and/or psychologist tells you otherwise, chances are what you're experiencing is called a trigger.
This is a very real thing and shouldn't be used as a synonym of somebody getting offended and that they need to grow up. That kind of attitude is abelist and people need to just use the word "offense" when somebody is actually offended. Zena & Poppy did a video a while back relating to Offense vs Harm, and I think people need to understand the differences.
Getting back on the topic of actual triggers, allow me to use myself as an example. After leaving the house of my abuser three years ago, there were certain things I couldn't hear or say without it igniting something in me, usually a strong negative emotion or my chest hurting. There was a ringtone I only used for the person who was my abuser: I can't hear that ringtone anymore without being upset. The individual in question also has a very common name, and I thank God that despite its commonality, I don't run into people very often who share my abuser's name.
So what do triggers have to do with The Owl House, or Dadrius for that matter? The answer is simple: Hunter was abused by Belos, and Coven Heads did him dirty through neglect or hostility: there was another post that did this part of Hunter's story far more justice than I ever could.
This doesn't help the fact that in Hunting Palismmn, Hunter literally had blades thrown in his face!
And for what? Disagreeing with Belos, his abuser!
To make matters infinitely worse, Hunter was so groomed by this point, I'm convinced that if Belos actually aimed for his face, he wouldn't move and let him run him through. Anything to please Belos, even death... remember Eclipse Lake?
Now, with that in mind, if you're an adult and you've made up your mind at this point that a child proved you wrong about something, is it really okay to raise your hand at them, like Darius does in Any Sport in A Storm?
Seriously, think about this from a real-life scenario for a bit: if there was a child who's had a history of abuse in their lives, is it really okay to do anything that might resurface those unpleasant memories, especially if they are still in that abusive relationship?
Now, there's a chance that Darius may not know the full extent of the abuse that Hunter was going through, I'll give him that... but he's still a Coven Head, and given the cut-throat nature of the Coven Heads even against each other, you'd think that this detail would be both more obvious to Darius and imply something to the Emperor's Coven Head.
And look, if you want to insist that maybe I'm over-thinking this, that's fine. It's just that in the process of thinking about both my personal experience with abuse and The Owl House, it just doesn't sit right with me when someone is very likely to know that somebody has experienced pain a certain way and do something that's counterproductive to that.
And I also get that Darius was trying to be intimidating so Hunter would prove his willingness to rebel, but at that point in the story, the Emerald Entrails were already leaving: there was no further use for Darius to be intimidating once it was just himself and Hunter.
So at the end of the day, I get how this scene is funny, I really do, and it's easier on my brain when I don't think about the implications of it. However, when I do take into account the context, what Hunter has to deal with, and what that means for someone who's been abused, it's a careless writing decision at best, and potentially malice at worst.
I like the concept of Dadrius, I really do, but like everything else, it has its flaws. Given season three being screwed over by Disney, I can't see Dadrius becoming canon. Thankfully, we have fan-fiction to explore certain ideas that will likely never be touched, such as Darius actually apologizing to Hunter for not being able to do more for him during the time he was abused by Belos, or even exploring what it means to have a real trigger, and how that effects somebody.
Anyway, what do you think? Am I overthinking this, or is there some merit to this, and in what way? I'd love to hear your thoughts.
